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just my thoughts but if you are in a monogamous relationship and often wish you could be in a more open relationship, you should communicate that to your partner. and if your partner makes you feel afraid to communicate that (not you being afraid out of anxiety, but them specifically saying things that make you afraid to say how you truly feel about stuff) then they are not being a good a partner. it might be a hard conversation but communication is the number one thing necessary for a good relationship.
if your justification is “well it’s useless because they would say no anyway” -> you won’t know until you communicate
and
if you feel at all restricted by monogamy, maybe it is not for you, and it may be hard to have to leave your partner if they’re not comfortable with an open relationship, but i don’t think you should sacrifice your happiness for someone else, no matter how much you love them. your feelings and desires matter. your life should not revolve around keeping your partner happy even if it means sacrificing your own happiness and freedoms.
#i wish my ex had just broken up with me#because instead she just cheated on me when i told her i wasn’t comfortable with opening our relationship 👍#but now i am in an open relationship and it is so much for freeing#even though we’re not currently seeing anyone else#just having that freedom and knowing it’s okay to get crushes on other people#or desire other people#not feeling guilty over that is everything#being able to talk to each other about crushes we get#or people we find hot etc#that’s something i personally need in a relationship#and if u feel like that’s something that would make you happier in ur relationship too#then you need to communicate that to your partner
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whenever right wing people talk about “parental rights” they are talking about property rights. they are arguing for further political and legal enshrinement of their children as their literal actual property
#I also wonder if this is like a middle class expression of a desire to shore up other property rights eg homeownership#like homeownership is a foundation base for the nuclear family. property rights allow you to own the resource#that produces the family and allows it to be ‘private’#so like children are another frontier of this property relationship#anyway. bad time to be a trans person lol#& all the actual legitimate issues w/ parental rights ie indigenous genocide forced sterilisation mass incarceration the foster system etc#are not even remotely concerns for these people because well. they’re fash lol
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I firmly believe that Kabru is autistic but masks so hard that he’s convinced himself and (almost) everyone around him that he’s neurotypical.
That man’s special interest is people and how they work, but he just thinks it’s him Being So Good At Socializing — like he doesn’t spend 95% of his time people watching and adjusting his personality in response to the traits he witnesses and obsessing over the intricacies of human interaction while mapping an ever growing relationship chart in his head. For fun. He even admits it in the manga!
Like, look at him!!!
It’s such a shame that — because he’s the narrative foil to Laios and his interest is generally considered more “socially acceptable” in both their world and our own — more people don’t realize this about him. He’s constantly misinterpreted as a horribly manipulative person who only acts the way he does to use the people around him, when that’s explicitly shown to not be the case at all. Kabru is naturally empathetic and is almost always thinking about other people, regardless of whether or not they’re right there with him or a thousand miles away.
I mean, his most defining motivation is his desire to do everything he can to avoid another tragedy like the one at Utaya. Someone who doesn’t care wouldn’t have a goal like that, and they most certainly wouldn’t go about it the way he does. He’s constantly working to help people who can help everyone else and tries so hard to make sure that anyone who seems like a threat is actually someone he needs to worry about before doing anything about it. His supposed aversion to Laios is only because of the ridiculous trolley problem he’s set up in his own head.
Outside of that, he (rather justifiably) hates monsters but is desperate to understand Laios’ love for them and his apparently most selfish goal in getting close to the guy was literally just to become friends with him.
When he’s interacting with the canaries and they imply that they’re going to take him and all of his friends to the West, his first thought is of Rin and how much she’d hate to be stuck in the place that gave her so many bad memories.
He helps Kuro learn Common when Mickbell is asleep and firmly looks forward to the day that the half-foot and Kuro can communicate properly so that their relationship can get properly started without any miscommunication.
And he understands Mithrun with only a handful of weeks AT BEST interacting with him, getting enraged when the elf seems to give up and immediately trying to help him find a new motivation for life.
I’m excited just thinking about the day that Kabru starts unmasking more and more around his friends — both new and old — because if being with my current friend group has taught me anything, it’s that hanging out with anyone so unabashedly themselves is bound to make you more comfortable with yourself too. It’s part of the reason why I like Labru so much! There’s something nice about imagining them hanging out in the throne room or laying in the grass outside and talking for hours on end about their special interests. They might not strictly understand what the other finds so fascinating about monsters or people, but they can grasp that shared feeling of love.
They probably influence each other in really good ways too, with Kabru helping Laios figure out what people are thinking even when it doesn’t make sense or Laios helping Kabru understand that not everyone and everything needs to be analyzed a thousand times over. They both get to learn that there are people like them and people who will love them without them ever having to change a thing about themselves. They deserve to know that they’re fine the way they are.
#I have so many more thoughts about these two#like how Laios is actually the one who couldn’t really care about people outside of his immediate friends and family#that his love is the one that would burn down the world if it meant the people he cared about got to be as safe and happy as they should be#always as themselves#never as the corrupted versions of them in their nightmares or by the winged lions distortions#which is how Kabru would learn to be more selfish and needy#encouraged to act on his own desires and help other people at the same time#these two have ruined me#especially Kabru#because I’m predictable and my other two favorite characters are Tachihara Michizou and Nara Shikamaru#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#dungeon meshi kabru#kabru of utaya#dungeon meshi laios#laios touden#dungeon meshi rin#rinsha fana#dungeon meshi mickbell#mickbell#dungeon meshi kuro#kuro#dungeon meshi mithrun#mithrun#labru
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Last post, I promise, but I do think it’s good and important to see local art (defining that term as broadly as possible) but in my experience you have to put up with the little kick of embarrassment you feel witnessing something too earnest, a little clumsy, not polished within an inch of its life or in step with prevailing trends.
I’m thinking of the dance performances I saw this weekend, but also last week’s street festival, where I watched short films and walked through local art exhibits; I’m thinking about Chicago’s outsider art museum, and even the elaborately decorated (ostensibly tacky) yards I see in rural Illinois, but South Carolina and Tennessee before that, and Michigan before that. Maybe I should cast an even broader net: my aunt’s cross stitch, my grand-aunt’s horrible poetry; the art they display at the nearby retirement community and the halfway house too, which comes from the residents.
If you’re not used to leaving space for that little kick, you might turn away or scoff at all this small, fumbling art. But I think there’s value in forcing yourself to look beyond that initial stab of secondhand embarrassment---to actually appreciate the art in front of you as an expression of something deeply human. You don’t have to think it’s objectively good, or even subjectively good. You don’t have to pretend that a local woman with a talent for oils is the next [INSERT FAMOUS ARTIST HERE]. But I do think you have to appreciate it, because otherwise there is no entrance into making art yourself.
And that, more than anything, is worth preserving.
#this is why AI art is a sin. because it takes something that is innately human#(namely the desire to make art. to create.)#and feeds it artificial goop. it's the artistic version of slimfast.#people are hungry for art and making art and you're feeding them zero cal shakes that taste like cardboard.#a slightly overcooked chicken with over-salted potatoes might not sound particularly appealing but at least it's better than that.#(there are other problems with AI but this is the one that annoys me.)#celestial emporium of benevolent knowledge
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I think some people need to understand that someone being aro/ace doesn't necessarily reflect what media they like to create/consume. I like to draw nsfw, I love raunchy romcom, I like to revolve fictional relationships in my head. Do I want to be put in that situation? No. Some might but that's the thing, fiction doesn't equate reality. It's all theoretical.
#it's like consuming any other media#if you like violent video games does that mean you like murdering people in real life?#when you watch horror do you desire to be in mc's place?#it's basically the same thing#unless it's Martin Blackwood then yes I would kill to be Jon
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JACK & JOKER: U STEAL MY HEART! (2024) I EP. 10
#jack and joker#jack x joker#jack and joker the series#jack and joker u steal my heart#jack & joker u steal my heart#jackjoke#jack x joke#forfive#yinwar#uservix#userrlaura#userrlana#userfaiza#userspicy#asiandramasource#yin anan#war wanarat#no words#literally i have no words because i know i speak rn#but something something about two people afraid of wanting better things for themselves#and now they're finally being able to express this kind of unadultered want and desire for each other in such an intimate way#mywork
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Hi! this is kinda an art request if u dont mind. And it's angst related, can you draw like where wanda and cosmo obvs have seen for a while how (human) timmy has been treated by his real parents. I just want to see like the "last straw" which lead Cosmo and Wanda wanting them to make Timmy as their own. (IM HAPPY THAT TIMMY HAS A FAMILY THAT LOVES AND CARES FOR HIM)
The "Last Straw"?
Cosmo and Wanda have seen humans at their best. They've seen humans at their worst. They've seen anything and everything that they've gone numb and used to what humans get up to.
But nothing's shaken them quite like Timmy's case did. Nothing has ever made a Fairy feel such strong human emotions than what Timmy made them feel, on that one particular night.
The thing that broke Cosmo and Wanda was Timmy himself.
Bitties Series: [Start] > [Previous] > [Next]
#asks#itty bitties fop au#germangirl321#tw abuse#tw emotional abuse#tw emotional distress#tw implied death#tw implied sui#tw sui implied#<- ask to tag#(especially ask to tag bcs these are the offered tumblr tags)#godkids wish for stupid things all the time. sometimes they wish for good things and bad things. or things that helps themselves or others#they wish for things that teaches them life lessons or for things that damages them in the future.#but at their core every child has a pure wish that they want more than anything.#for hazel. her core wish is for change to stop. for dev. his core wish is for his father's love#timmy's wish. at the center of everything. is to run away from himself and all that he is. to be something- anything- but Him.#its this core wish that fairies desire most. its their ambrosia. and its almost always impossible to grasp in its purity.#they cant stop change or forge a father's love after all.#Most fairies would be ecstatic to claim a child's core wish. It's the peak of their career- highly coveted highly praised.#but Cosmo and Wanda took no pleasure when they finally consumed their one- and only one for they'd never do it again- core wish.#as said before. cosmo and wanda really. really love timmy turner. and timmy really really loves his fairies. love!!! is a powerful thing!!#anyways this is a heavy topic and a heavy ask so im keeping it out of the main tags#also if you're curious as to whose responding back to timmy#its cosmo#lots of people tend to portray wanda as the more emotional sensitive type. yknow the “motherly” role.#but i think thats wrong.#was considering cutting out their responses for this ask#but then i figured that CosWan would be responding back in earnest to calm him down as best they could
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I have to talk about Chester Arthur. His story makes me go crazy. A mediocre president from the 1880s who's completely forgotten today has one of the best redemption stories I've ever heard and I need to make people understand just how cool his story is.
So, like, he starts out as this idealist, okay? He's the son of an abolitionist minister and becomes famous as a New York lawyer who defends the North's version of Rosa Parks whose story desegregates New York City's trolley system.
Then he starts getting pulled into politics and becomes one of the grimiest pieces of the political machine. He wants money, power, prestige, and he gets it. He becomes the right-hand man of Roscoe Conkling, the most feared political boss in the nation, a guy who will throw his weight around and do the most ruthless things imaginable to keep his friends in power and destroy his enemies.
Because Arthur's this guy's top lackey, he gets to be Controller of the Port of New York--the best-paying political appointment in the country, because that port brings in, like, 70% of the federal government's funds in tariffs. He gets a huge salary plus a percentage of all the fines they levy on lawbreakers, and because he's not afraid to make up infractions to fine people over, he is absolutely raking in the dough. Making the rough equivalent of $1.3 million a year--absolutely insane amounts of money for a government position. He's spending ridiculous sums on clothes, buying huge amounts of alcohol and cigars to share with people as part of his job recruiting supporters to the party, going out nearly every night to wine and dine people as part of his work in the political machine. He's living the high life. Even when President Hayes pulls him from his position on suspicions of fraud, he's still living a great life of wealth, power, and prestige.
Then in 1880, his beloved wife dies. While he's out of town working for a political campaign. And he can't get back in time to say goodbye before she dies. Because he's a guy who has big emotions, it absolutely tears him up inside, especially because Nell resented how much his political work kept him away from home. He has huge regrets, but he just moves in with Roscoe Conkling and keeps working for the political machine.
And then he gets a chance to be vice president. The Republican Party has nominated James Garfield, a dark horse candidate who wants to reform the spoils system that has given Conking his power and gave Arthur his position as Port Controller. Conkling is pissed, and he controls New York, and since the party's not going to win the election without New York, they think that appointing Conkling's top lackey as vice-president will pacify him.
They're wrong--Conkling orders Arthur to refuse--but Arthur thinks this sounds like a great opportunity. The only political position he's ever held is Port Controller--a job he wasn't elected to and that he was pulled from in disgrace. Vice President is way more than he could ever have hoped for. It's a position with a lot of political pull and zero actual responsibilities. He'll get to spend four years living in up in Washington high society. It's the perfect job! Of course he accepts, and Conkling comes around when he figures out that he can use this to his advantage.
When Garfield becomes president, Arthur does everything he can to undermine him. He uses every dirty political trick he can think of to block everything that Garfield wants to do. He refuses to let the Senate elect a president pro tempore so he can stay there and influence every bill that comes through. He all but openly boasts of buying votes in the election. He's so much Conkling's lackey that he may as well be the henchman of a cartoon supervillain. On Conkling's orders, he drags one of Garfield's Cabinet members out of bed in the middle of the night--while the guy is ill--to drag him to Conkling's house so he can be forced to resign. He's just absolutely a thorn in the president's side, a henchman doing everything he can to maintain the corrupt spoils system.
Then in July 1881, when Arthur's in New York helping Conkling's campaign, the president gets shot. By a guy who shouts, "Now Arthur will be president!" just after he fires the gun. Arthur has just spent the past four months fighting the president tooth and nail. Everyone thinks he's behind the assassination. There are lynch mobs looking to take out him and Conkling. The papers are tearing him apart.
Arthur is absolutely distraught. He rushes to Washington to speak with the president and assure him of his innocence, but the doctors won't let him in the room. He gets choked up when talking to the First Lady. Reporters find him weeping in his house in Washington. Once again, death has torn his world apart and he's not getting a chance to make amends.
Arthur goes to New York while the president is getting medical treatment, and he refuses to come to Washington and take charge because he doesn't dare to give the impression that he's looking to take over. No one wants Arthur to be president and he doesn't want to be president, and the possibility that this corrupt political lackey is about to ascend to the highest office in the land is absolutely terrifying to everyone.
Then in August, when it's becoming clear that the president is unlikely to recover, he gets a letter. From a 31-year-old invalid from New York named Julia Sand. A woman from a very politically-minded family who has been following Arthur's career for years. And she writes him this astounding letter that takes him to task for his corrupt, conniving ways, and the obsession with worldly power and prestige that has brought him wealth and fame at the cost of his own soul--and she tells him that he can do better. In the midst of a nationwide press that's tearing him apart, this one woman writes to tell him that she believes he has the capacity to be a good president and a good man if he changes his ways.
And then he does. After Garfield dies, people come to Arthur's house and find servants who tell them that Arthur is in his room weeping like a child (I told you he had big emotions), but he takes the oath of office and ascends to the presidency. And he becomes a completely different man. His first speech as president mentions that one of his top priorities is reforming the spoils system so that people will be appointed based on merit rather than getting appointed as political favors with each change in the administration. Even though this system made him president. When Conkling comes to Arthur's office telling him to appoint his people to important government positions, Arthur calls his demands outrageous, throws him out, and keeps Garfield's appointees in the positions. "He's not Chet Arthur anymore," one of his former political friends laments. "He's the president."
He loses all his former political friends. He's never trusted by the other side. Yet he sticks to his guns and continues to support spoils system reform. He prosecutes a postal service corruption case that everyone thought he would drop. He's the one who signs into law the first civil service reform bill, even though presidents have been trying to do this for more than ten years, and he's the person who's gained all his power through the spoils system. He immediately takes action to enforce this bill when he could have just dropped it. He becomes a champion of this issue even though it's the last thing anyone would have expected of him.
He oversees naval reform. He oversees a renovation of the White House. He still prefers the social duties of the presidency, but he's respectable in a way that no one expected. Possibly because Julia Sand keeps sending him letters of encouragement and advice over the next two years. But also because he's dying.
Not long after ascending to the presidency, he learns he's suffering from a terminal kidney disease. And he tells no one. He keeps going about his daily life, fulfilling his duties as president, and keeps his health problems hidden. Once again, death is upending his life, and this time it's his own death. He's lived a life he's ashamed of, and he doesn't have much time left to change. He enters the presidency as an example of the absolute worst of the political system, and leaves it as a respectable man.
He makes a token effort to seek re-election, but because of his health problems, he doesn't mind at all when someone else gets the nomination. He dies a couple of years after leaving office. The day before his death, he orders most of his papers burned, because he's ashamed of his old life--but among the things that are saved are the letters from Julia Sand, the woman who encouraged him to change his ways.
This is an astounding story full of so many twists and turns and dramatic moments. A man who falls from idealism into the worst kind of corruption and then claws his way back up to decency because of a series of devastating personal losses and unexpected opportunities to do more than he could have ever hoped to do. I just go crazy thinking about it and I need you all to understand just how amazing this story is.
#history is awesome#presidential talk#i thought about his story again this morning#and was once again struck by the desire to chase people down and make them understand just how amazing this story is#and instead of harassing random strangers i decided to inflict it on tumblr again#my original essay was rather too long and dry and tangled up in too many other details#and didn't quite capture the 'i want to chase you down and look you in the eye and make you freak out about this with me' vibe of this stor#this still doesn't quite capture it but at least it's shorter#and prevents me from rambling to unsuspecting family members#sorry for inflicting this on you again but what else am i supposed to do?
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thank you for a great art fight! here's some of my final attacks. had a blast, already missing it - see you next year!
#my art#art fight#artfight#artfight2024#anthro#monster#furry#genuinely already missing it i always feel a bit empty for the first few days after art fight ends#it takes up SO much of my free time in july nowadays like july is just the art fight month. to me#hoping to fill the void by doing something that's been eating away at me for years at this point#which is to start taking some of my oc projects more seriously.....and start developing them into something...#i know i can (probably) never make money off my ocs but i think i will start eating my hands off if i don't try to tell their stories#all fun and games but also it's like an obsession 2 me i love my characters....i love them...#and unfortunately i most love my least marketable characters#but whatever i'm sure there will be a couple people who care#feel like i'm at a crossroads and i'm picking the least desirable path but also there's some release in that....#i need to follow that advice that's like make art for yourself and five other likeminded freaks#anyway i'm rambling.....again....it's what i do in the tags
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Curly's little blurb on his steam trading card just keeps reminding me he is a much more miserable person than people realize.
We don't get a lot of his thoughts, inner confliction that aren't bogged down by what Jimmy says or does. Even in the The Last One and Then Another, his dialogue is reflective, not the Curly before the crash but the result of everything. Parts of the him he was are there of course, but also disfigured and warped beyond recognition just like he is physically.
Curly really doesn't think much of himself and desires. He clearly chases fleeting moments of happiness. He doesn't really have prospects for himself, assumes in a similar way to Swansea, that if it should make it happy then he is happy. Though, he hasn't reached the point Swansea did to admit it doesn't. He neither sees the glass half full or empty, it's just water, something he needs and he'll take it from any perspective.
He wasn't running from anything but he's never really been going towards something either. He's listless. I've been using the term complacent to describe how he feels about his life and the closest people (really just Jimmy) in it, but now that word feels too neutral, too nice. Happier than Curly really was. There isn't just one word for it, he's unfulfilled, uncertain, uninspired. There are no active problems he faces and that's the issue, why should he be upset?
I believe he really is a person who doesn't know who he is or wants to be. He follows a structure. I don't think he's suicidal, but he clearly doesn't think about what makes him happy. He's numb. I suppose that is a better word than complacent, used to the feeling even if he hates it. It doesn't hurt so why stop it?
#like curly is very much does his job goes home takes care of self repeat i dont think hes like an asocial person but he doesn't take the tim#time to indulge in himself the way he thinks hes a bigger picture guy so as long as nothing is disrupted hes relatively okay even if its#slowly chipping away at him and making him feel hollow like he thought space was endless that he could never reach a point of feeling finis#he never had to predict what to do after the end and suddently he realizes there was no end to it because there cant be an end to nothing#hes accomplished so much objectively but hes done nothing with his life outside of his work like he mentions no hobbies other friends or an#thing of the sort he doesn't even feel like he can vent it cause what? hes complaining about how hard it is to get promoted to have securit#in a job you hate and a position that keeps weighing you down like I feel like if he explained himself at the party and didn't let Jimmy t#talk for him hed actually have made points the others would get cause even if they envied his position he still is justified in being unhap#not everything that you think would bring you happiness does or fulfills even a small part of that desire#idk hes a lot more fucked in the head but like towards himself than people realize like how he lets Jimmy treat him is indicitive of that i#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#captain curly#curly mouthwashing
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the thing about victor frankenstein is that, aside from the deeply unpleasant but distressingly period-typical views about women and his polar exploration sunk-cost fallacy attitude, he's not even really an outstandingly bad individual. spending two years trying to make a whole person with no solid plan for what to then Do with this person is an extremely extremely bad idea, but after that all his reactions to stress and tragedy are fairly common and natural. avoidance, depression, decision paralysis, secret keeping, etc., these are very normal trauma responses. they are just literally all of the very worst responses he could possibly have had given his particular situation.
#blind fear and panic and a desire to just Ignore Everything after (more or less) having a child is a pretty common feeling#it's why you really really need other people around to share the load in the first few years#he did not have that. and then he could not think about facing the problem without having a breakdown until it was too late.#frankenstein#marina marvels at life
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I hope that old man is the hottest piece of ass on the vampire market and everyone has a turn on that ride next season. I said what I said and I speak the truth.
#daniel molloy#i would be in line for sure#had to speak my truth on this as I do not understand why people are afraid of seeing a older man be desired#iwtv#interview with the vampire#hope him and lestat do coke off of each other dicks#if not that I hope they makeout sloppy style as I feel like that just needs to happen#please amc gods or someone on the writers team please somehow connect to my thoughts and add them to the show#alteregomprambles
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"It's so embarrassing to admit I only create art for validation" did paleolithic humans not paint for other humans to see. Does a child making their first drawing to show their parents makes it any less valuable. Do gardens arranged for the visitors' eyes make the roses any less beautiful. Do love poems written for one person alone to hear make your heart ache less. You're fine
#jay rambles.txt#two very hard pills to swallow: 1. art has always been created for money and it's a very normal practice in human history#and actually artists being expected to produce art for free or as cheap as they do now is a relatively new thing#2. humans have always created art for validation because being recognised and understood by your fellow humans is a universal human need#if you start to idealise artistry as something inherently selfless that needs to come with no gain or benefits or instead brings only pain#you are going down a VERY dangerous path of not being able to express yourself without shame - if at all#and potentially dragging other people you told close down into that mentality too if you're vocal about it#I've been there#I am there#It's a shitty feeling but the only way out of it is true embrace your need to be loved and desire for human connection or it won't end well#idk that's my opinion tho
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I wonder how many people really love and relate to Alisaie because they too were the girl who struggled to understand how folks around her could act like suffering and selfishness and hivemind behavior was normal and their softness was called a weakness and so they built up an abrasive exterior to force people to take them seriously and now they don't know how to be vulnerable without feeling embarrassed or cringe even though they still feel things so deeply it's almost suffocating...
#it's me#i feel like i really understand why ali is always trying to prove herself#how strong and capable she is#that she isn't just emotional or impulsive#like i stated on another post alisaie's “violence” is more related to both her desire to be taken seriously#and also her preference for direct action rather than politics#she's a protector and defendor#and she is deeply frustrated by the way the world turned out#and i think she partially has felt very lonely in that for a long time#she just wants people to do right by each other#and she hates to see suffering and injustice#and she maybe hates even more that the general public kind of just falls in line#alisaie#alisaie leveilleur
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Curry pt. i // Curry pt. ii
yeah alright okay. fine. cool. alright. yeah
#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#dunmeshi spoilers#dunmeshiposting#thistle#delgal#melinis#touden siblings#laios#falin#fam#roomba media#spiritual successors who are also literal successors. gets me where it hurts#also yes i did cherry pick which TLs left the most impact on me personally#thistle's dialogue in the original japanese is apparently written in hiragana in the above panel which gives it a childish feel in spite of#the burden he's carrying. and there is something about 'we'll be together forever' that conveys that so well#and i LOVE laios apologizing for being late considering how much shade is thrown at him in universe and out for#supposedly caring about his monster interest more than falin. but he DOES love her she IS the most important thing to him#he thinks her monster form is so cool but he promises to change her back THAT'S most important to him#imagining the guilt he carries over that disparity between his greatest desire and what's most important to him is gut-wrenching though#neurodivergent feelings manga of all time#one set of siblings regressing to a point of no return and caging themselves in#and the other set growing into fully-realized people breaking free of their cages inheriting the kingdom of the first#phew
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Person with no whimsy: Why are you trying to trick g-d with loopholes? 🙄🙄🙄🙄
#jumblr#antisemitism tw#personal thoughts tag#practicing judaism because i am chock FULL of whimsy wonder joy and a zeal for life#i know we talk at length about this but my whimsy is whimsy-ing#also i don't think you even NEED to do these things 'for' g-d#i'm not becoming jewish for g-d. i do it out of love for g-d but that's not my reason (or my biggest reason)#i'm doing this for me. would that blow your mind to know...#conversion is partially a selfish desire to have the Most fun and fulfillment#this is something i genuinely believe in but i have learned to chase happiness and wonder#judaism captured my soul in that way. i find beauty and comfort and fulfillment and peace in this#g-d plays a role in my life but i know He knows we are people. we live for ourselves and each other#i made this post three days ago in a vaguepost about seeing this yet AGAIN. and i saw it again today (08/21) so#time to vaguepost in a petty way. because i love judaism and this annoys me
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